Wednesday, April 04, 2007

So he comes up to me, right, and he says to me, "You shouldn't be doing that in public." And I'm like, "Well, sir, that's quite the point." And he says, "But it's obscene!" And I'm like, "That, too, sir, is quite the point." So he shakes his head and goes inside, right, and at first I don't think anything of it. But then I remember there's a payphone right in the lobby and this guy - I can just tell - is the type to call Jake on me. So I shuffle up to the building, right, and I - hey! you still with me? Alright, yeah, so anyway, I shuffle up to the building - which is pretty hard to do with your pants around your ankles - and I poke my head around the edge of the brick wall right at the side there and I look around the wall and inside, just like I thought, buddy's on the phone. He's talking and looking to the street and I think he saw me 'cause he seemed to get real excited and he pointed at me. So I go back to the sidewalk, right, and like a minute later buddy comes out and tells me he's called the police, I should get outta here, that type a' shit. So I look him dead in the eye. I don't say a word. I don't know why, but for some reason he's looking back at me. He doesn't turn away. So we're standing there looking each other right square in the eye for what feels like a good, solid minute. Finally he says something, a little quieter this time. "Listen, buddy," he says. "No hard feelings and all. Just get outta here before they come. You don't want to go to jail, do ya?" I clear my throat. "Well, sir," I begin. "That, too, is quite the point." I swear, I thought he was going to shit. Anyway, Jake never showed up so it was all good. So, yeah, how was your day?

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